Real Estate is an industry that seems to be full of people pleasers (ehem like me) or people with no care or feelings towards anyone else. Sometimes it feels like we live in a bi-polar ecosystem.
There are some great aspects to being a people pleaser.
You tend to work to your clients needs and wants instead of your own.
The client experience means everything to you.
Your clients and colleagues tend to love you.
The dark side to being a people pleaser:
You end up feeling taken advantage of most often.
Resentment builds up and bursts out on the people you love most.
Your clients don't always trust that you will do what you say
Most importantly, you get lost in the shuffle. You start behaving and acting as if you don't matter and when you don't matter you stop caring.
When you are living it, you know these things and you may even be thinking, "Well no crap! I know there is a problem, just how do I fix it!?"
As a self-proclaimed recovering people pleaser I put together a few tools to stop (well at least slow down) being a 'yes man' and be a great man/woman.
Tool #1
You will let yourself down before you let anyone else down. Use this to your advantage. Tie in accountability, so that you stick to the things you want. If your goal is to take a weekend off or create more sales, set up accountability that will make that happen. Involve your family, friends, or a coach with what you are wanting to do. When letting yourself down means you are letting them down; You won't let them down and in doing so, you don't let yourself down.
Tool #2
Gutter Bumpers are personal savers! Set up gutter bumpers to keep the things you want moving and out of the gutters of others' needs. You might also call these boundaries. If you are a people pleaser, you are also a giver. Takers will never set up boundaries so it is up to us to do it. Boundaries mean you are going to be uncomfortable and come out weird too in the beginning. We can't tackle everything at once and create a million boundaries and stick to them too. So pick the biggest pain point (i.e. clients keep calling and messaging all times of the day and night OR finding yourself always taking care of unnecessary work) and put a boundary in place. Set up an expectation of your needs, "I respond to calls and messages between 8am and 7pm. Anything that comes in after that will be responded to the next day." Clients like knowing the best way to work with you as well!
Tool #3
Put systems in place to outwork your flaws. The best part about running a business is the control we have over our messes. On one hand we have no control over the unforeseen issues but on the other hand we have complete control over the prevention of 99% of our problems, because most of our problems are redundant. We hear the same complaints (sometimes coming from our own brain) and yet go on with the same frustrations. Pay attention to your frustrations and start putting systems in place that take care of the issues.
It is your life and you can mold your business to actually fit your life. What good is doing this work without satisfaction in our own life?
Gutter bumpers! That’s a great term.